I shouldn’t have to be writing about this topic this day and age but sadly I still need to bring some attention to it. I heard again from another client recently how other therapists that she had been to in the past, she felt had tried to ‘milk her’ of her money by making her dependant on coming back for continual sessions. This client said,
“George, you’re not like most of the other therapists out there. You are not trying to milk me for what you can get. You are not trying to make me dependant on you, (coming to see you for years without signs of solid benefit and progress.) I can feel how you really care and are genuinely helping me to change and release the past. I can feel the difference with you. I can feel the progress and the change.”
Sadly many therapists out there are not really interested in you healing yourself. They want to make sure that you keep having your problem so you have to keep going back to them, so they earn an income. How crazy is that? Years ago, I even had one prominent psychiatrist say this exact thing straight in my face, with a smirk. I was appalled. But I kept a straight face and moved on.
How I work? How I imagine any good therapist works.
I want you to get better 100% (or at least feel genuine improvement) in the least amount of sessions possible! Once you feel the benefit and go off to live your life, you would want to recommend others to see me to get help too. This is how I operate. 75% of my client base are now referrals from past satisfied clients. Of course I also recommend some maintenance sessions every year or two if needed. But not full dependency, where you have to keep seeing me for life, just to get by.
As my client said, you can normally feel this attitude in the therapist. Are they really on your side and listening and adapting to your needs and pain? Or are they just going through the motions, relying on their ‘qualifications’ to mesmerise you into believing that they know best and that you will need them forever.
As a rule, if you haven’t felt a genuine benefit within (max) 10 sessions with a therapist – leave! Find someone else. Even if that therapist is subsidised by the government and you don’t have to pay much – leave! Don’t become a dependent victim. Deep down, you are a powerful, loving, joyous, free and alive spirit/human being. If your therapist doesn’t see this when they work with you, my recommendation is to leave.